Bachelorette Jillian Harriss baby fell from his chair when she left him for a minute
People Magazine’s cover story this week is a bizarre look at all the former Bachelorette contestants who are now new moms. It’s hard to know People’s motivation for running this particular cover, although I’ve felt that way about a lot of People covers over the years. It’s probably a cross promotional deal with the Bachelor/Bachelorette franchise and also it must appeal to new moms and moms in general. Just reading Jillian Harris’s story, about the mom guilt she’s had as the mother to newborn son Leo, eight months, brought back so many memories of how bittersweet that time was, and how fleeting.
Jillian and five other Bachelorettes, including DeAnna Pappas, Ali Fedotowski and Ashley Hebert, were interviewed by People and there’s a video up on their site. This particular question was about mom guilt and mom shaming, and it’s relevant now in the age of social media, where these women are public figures sharing their lives to further their careers. They get a lot of bullsh-t comments on Instagram and Twitter directed at their parenting. Watching the panel video made me remember how isolating it was to be a new mom, and what a refuge La Leche League was, where I could connect with other moms of newborns. The bachelorettes seemed relieved to be able to talk about their experiences with their babies. Here’s some of what Jillian Harris told People:
“I think that everybody gets mom guilt, and as females out there, I’m sure we’re all so hard on ourselves,” the former Bachelorette tells PEOPLE in an exclusive interview for this week’s issue that also includes show alums DeAnna Pappas Stagliano (season 4), Ali Fedotowsky-Manno (season 6), Ashley Hebert Rosenbaum (season 7), Emily Maynard Johnson (season 8) and Desiree Hartsock Siegfried (season 9) — all who welcomed babies in 2016.
“Should I work? How much should I work? Do I leave him with a nanny? Do I don’t?” continues Harris, 37, who appeared on The Bachelorette season 5 and now works as an interior designer and the host of Love It or List It Vancouver.
“I feel like one of the things I always worried about is what kind of energy would I have around him,” Harris continues. “I know that he senses that energy and I think, for the most part, if I’ve ever had a bad day or frustrating day or if I’m sad, I feel like I’ve been strong for him so far. I know that there’s going to be a day where I break down and he’s going to have to witness that.”
The mom of one — who got engaged to Leo’s dad Justin Pasutto, 29, on Christmas Day — admits that even though she has come to terms with the fact that she is only human, she still carries the weight of one particular instance that she does “feel very guilty about.”
“He was probably 10 days old and we were at our Vancouver house setting up the nursery and I had him in one of those little like bouncy chairs. And he was sleeping. And I didn’t strap him in because I didn’t want him to wake up,” she recalls.
“I went downstairs to grab some laundry and we heard some crying upstairs and we ran upstairs, and he had slid out and rolled over,” Harris continues. “And that’s before we even started him on tummy time or anything. It had maybe been like five seconds, but Justin was like, ‘Jillian! Why didn’t you strap him in?’
Harris explains that she deals with her fair share of mom shaming, too (“If one more person tells me that the Sophie Giraffe gets black mold everywhere, ” she jokes). But some of the cry-inducing emotions she feels are completely because of just how much she loves her son.
“The other night … I was kind of lying there watching [Leo] while he was sleeping, and then he opened his eyes and just stared at me … and looked at me like, ‘I love you,’ ” she says. “Tears just started pouring down my face and there was nobody to share that with, it was just him and [me].”
So many moms have stories like the one she told about her son falling out of his chair. When my son was three months old he fell asleep on the bed with my husband when we were visiting my parents. Their bed was higher off the ground than ours – and he promptly tumbled off it. I was mortified and so worried and I still think of it. During the toddler years he got goose egg size bumps on his head more than once. It’s a pain in the ass to be a mom and as rewarding as it is at times the difficult moments can be hard to take. I really like what Jillian said about being conscious of the energy she’s putting out around her kid. This is true for me still and my son is a tween. Plus his own mood affects mine so much.
Also that Sophie Girafffe thing that Jillian mentions is a teething toy which apparently is hollow inside and can collect mold. I was reading the reviews on Amazon and there are photos where parents cut the thing open to show the mold inside. Ew.
THIS EASTER PHOTO!!
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